Absolutely Suzanne! Hell yeah. I write about the "selfish" term quite a bit and summise that if it is selfish to not have kids, it is selfish to have them, as we are all essentially do what we want to do. But I don't believe either is inherently selfish.

So in my view - I don't even think your mum has a claim to call you selfish. I endured years of hell from my ex MIL who desperately wanted me to have a baby so she could have a baby. This experience started my childfree advocacy and writing journey.

I believe asking someone who doesn't want children, to have children, so you have a grandchild is abhorrently selfish. To ask someone to be pregnant, birth and raise a child who categorically does not want to do so, just so you get to interact with it a few times a year/month/week IS selfish. And ultimately it is not fair on the child either!

But luckily - like you say - you mum hasn't gone there. PHEW.

Folk like my ex MIL need educating!