Thanks for your comments. Have a wee look at my other piece, which may give you a greater understanding of my position if you are interested.
The truth is motherhood repels me and there is absolutely no part of me that wants this. This is not a wrong feeling. It is how I have always felt and is my authentic feeling. Just like some people have a strong urge towards motherhood, I have a strong urge away from it. I'm completely happy with this.